"You will find," he warned us, "that if you treat this test as 'the most important thing ever' and give up living the other parts of your life for it, that just around the corner there will be the next 'most important thing ever'." He waited for the message to sink in, before reminding us again to study for the sake of learning and of our future patients rather than for a test.
~~~
It was an important message to hear, as we don't hear it often and rarely let ourselves believe it. In thinking over his advice, i have decided to keep track of all the wonderful things that happen in these next four months that don't involve prep for the USMLE, and rejoice in the ability to live a balanced life.
To keep that resolution, a brief thought on today:
I was able to travel with friends out to Sharon, MA to visit two (other) very good friends who live out there. As one of the friends is a professional photographer, we all ended up taking loads and loads of photos (in the snow, in costume, around the house, etc). It was joyful to take part in something creative, and inspiring to see my friend masterfully frame and draw out the beauty in each photo and in each person.
That's the other part of my professor's message that only now am I getting. If the next four months of life were spent only in pursuit of ever higher numerical grades, the beauty of the human body, of the unique story of each patient, would pass me by. Each day in medical school, wonders quietly surround us. On Friday, I looked at my own blood under a microscope and saw a mosaic of well formed cells, all of whom work together to help sustain life. The awe of that moment is too easily lost in the scramble to memorize the names and functions of each type of cell. As Henri Matisse said, there are flowers everywhere, but only for those who bother to look.
As I continue to record my adventures over these next four months, I will keep that idea, and the advice of my professor in mind.
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